The Annual Report

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Time: 4:56
© 1996 Incredible Vibrato, BMI
On "Marketing Blues" by Marketing Mike and the Suits
Available through BizBlues Records at

Oh shit,
It's the annual report
Hot damn,
It's the annual report
We want to sound good
Without winding up in court

The president's letter
Must sound profound
So it gets rewritten
Right into the ground

Lawyers and accountants
Check every word
Because all the results
Amount to a turd

Oh shit,
It's the annual report

Get the president's picture
Make him look good
Make him look dynamic
Not like a piece of wood

Gotta make him look
Ten years younger, yeah
The president's picture
Is more important than the report

Lawyers and accountants
Look over every word
It's just so amazing
How they hide

Until it's time
For the annual report
But you're the one who gets blamed
In this stupid game

By the time you go to press
You don't care who you impress
All you want to do is just
Get some rest

But it's no good
They're still making changes
Even though the deadline you gave 'em
Was a month and a half ago

Oh shit!

You finally give up
You say "what the hell"
You can't make the president's letter
Sound like the company's doing well

So you decide
To put the letter against a
Black background

'Cause maybe people's eyes will get tired
When they try to read the damn thing
And then they won't know

Oh shit,
Everybody's an expert in
The graphic arts

Oh shit,
That layout doesn't fit the
Company's image
You say "what the hell"
The company's image is Bozo

Oh shit,
it's the annual report

You finally feel good
'Cause you've got the whole thing done
It's been press checked
Then you find out
The accountants made math mistakes

Oh shit
You gotta stay at a printer in a
Bad part of town
For another week
No sleep
No nothing

But now at least
The accountants
Don't want to see it any more
They don't want any credit

We want to sound good
Without winding up in court, yeah

Oh shit,
It's the annual report

The words above were written by a songwriter who is desperately trying to make a living. Copying, retransmission or unauthorized reuse of this work not only violates federal copyright law, punishable by civil and criminal sanctions, but is outright theft and harms this author's livelihood. Please don't do it. For special permission, contact BizBlues Records.

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